boyfriend borrowing car ect

[notwhoi thinkiam]

I need some advise.

 

My boyfriend had decided to start staying at my house, without asking he just started staying overnight and didn't stop. Which isn't a problem I guess. It will be a problem if he thinks it is permanents because it is not my intention to live with someone b/f marriage. But thats not the big issue.

 

My issue is that he seems to take for granted that I'm going to buy all the groceries, pay all the bills, pay for gas (he uses my car all the time w/o filling the tank) and pay for meals 80% of the time when we go out.

 

Yes, he does do some things for me. He did buy me new snow tires for my car and he does every once in a while buy some sort of food and bring it home.

 

I hate to be the sort that keeps track of everything and makes sure no one is giving more than the other, but I just got out of supporting a family member through a hard time which drained my finances to past the breaking point and now this. I'll have $40.00 left for a week after paying all the bills this month.

 

What made me start to think is that lately he has started making noises like he would LOVE it if I would have supper for him every once in a while. I told him I bought the groceries so I don't have to cook them.

 

And he asks me if I can help him out by making coffee in the morning. Or if he is in a hurry to do a load of his laundry.

 

OH GOD The more I go on the more pathetic I sound. You have to understand that my goal in life to this point is to never get attached, never live together and never ever ever get married. Now I'm acting like a spineless twit!

 

The thing that bothers me is I'm seeing passive-aggressive actions on my part. I'm not interested in giving oral or other things besides man on top sex. I don't want to hang out with his friends. I certainly don't want to meet his family. And while he and the crew are fantastically in shape, which he wants me to be (for my sake) I'm binging almost every day from the stress.

 

I'm afraid I'm going to blow and tell him to kiss my freaking butt and GET OUT!! But the thing is whenever I do get up the nerve to calmly discuss things with him he is fine with changing whatever it is I bring up.

 

He says he loves me. He says he's never felt this way before. He is talking about marriage and kids.

 

That would be so wonderful. It would be perfect if he had his own car and would come and go with that instead of me having to drop him off and pick him up or let him take my car. It would be even more perfect if he would pick up some groceries every other week.

 

Is it me? I've honestly never had a man in my life who was considerate enough to think of me over themselves. Is it to much for a man to think of these things? Is it to much for a person to notice things like maybe I'm not pulling my financial weight or maybe she needs to feel appreciated. Do I just get the dumb guys who have to be told how mature adults act? Or is it that I just don't speak up? It bothers me that I'm constantly thinking about not putting others out, pulling my weight, not taking more than my share while others are going through life w/o a care in the world about other people.

 

Has anyone else been in a relationship like this? How did you get through it?

 

HELP!!