ash519 Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 My situation: My brother brought 2 friends to the bowling alley. I didnt give them a second look (in that way) and one didnt even talk to me. Turns out he had a huge crush on me, but I started dating someone else. We broke up and the quiet guy came forth with his feelings. I wasnt interested enough. We made out from time to time and hung out a bunch, but it wasnt there for me. We became friends for about 2 years or so and I didnt see him like that. I dont know what happend, but my mind changed. We have now been together for 2 years and living together for one and I am so completely in love!!! So, although I understand it is the norm for the za za zoo to be there fromn the beginning, that is not neccasarily the situation! Link to post Share on other sites
dropdeadlegs Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 Chemistry...I never could grasp it as an educational subject. I don't always feel za za zoom immediately upon meeting someone, but I always get the feeling that I would like to get to know them better. Having that feeling has seemed to work out better for me in reaching a long term relationship status. The scenario that Topper used is pretty much what I mean. It's not an immediate chemistry, but a wanting to spend more time together. In time the flirting and innuendo happen and sometimes (it's an ego thing) feeling that someone is attracted to YOU makes them more attractive themselves. Still, I trust the immediate za za zoom less than the kind that develops a bit more slowly. It is mored based on compatibility than instant physical attraction, which sometimes has blinders on. All that being said, I'm not sure I have ever been able to convince myself to have feelings like this when they aren't there. That's like someone looking good on paper to me. Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 In my own experience, I have found that "chemistry" can *lie* to you. (Smile) I don't think it's all about "chemistry" as in the continuous Fourth-of-July kind of "rockets red glare/bombs bursting in air" kind of fireworks. A little of the right kind of excitement, though -and intrigue- maybe, a good dose of "smarts", good looks, and a few other choice traits I, personally, find admirable and attractive -and you can call it "chemistry" or just about anything you like, as long as it's something that is not contrived, and is going to last. I think it's a combination of what you *feel*, combined with what you *know*. -Rio Good post! this, in a nut shell is how i feel/ view chemistry. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Star Gazer Posted February 7, 2007 Author Share Posted February 7, 2007 I met her for dinner. She was absolutely beautiful, great to look at, amazingly intelligent and classy, and has the same entertainment interests as me (e.g., loves Evil Dead and MST3K). However... bigger butt than I have ever liked. I decided to go forward despite the butt thing, and love ensued. Normally perhaps, the butt would have made it a no-go as it is high on my list of importance... shallow, I know. But am I not redeemed by the fact that I acknowledged the butt was not the end all? How much bigger of a butt are we talking about here?!?! Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 But am I not redeemed by the fact that I acknowledged the butt was not the end all? since the butt still haunts you... No redemtion For You! i think you will find the Butt to be the end all... *technically* it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytellan Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 since the butt still haunts you... No redemtion For You! i think you will find the Butt to be the end all... *technically* it is. Actually, it doesn't haunt me. I fantasize about it now. I have fond visions of spanking it And for you, Star Gazer, It's not fantastically huge, but you need to understand that when a guy (well, not all, don't wanna drag all the other guys down with me) has a physical "type", sometimes it can be very difficult to stray from it. I am a "butt" guy, so I took it seriously that hers did not fit into my schema of "dateable" at the time. I look back and want to kick my own a** for ever thinking her butt was not awesome then, but hey... we all live and learn. I like to use it as a pillow when we're done I feel dirty this morning... gonna be a long day at work... Link to post Share on other sites
brokenhart2007 Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 I agree with woggle and topper, etc...I think chemistry has the ability to happen right away as well as over time. In most of my experiences I felt chemistry later rather than right away...however I'm single so what does that say! I had a very casual 1st date with a guy last week, and I had an inkling of chemistry, but it was a very brief and non-affectionate meeting. We've agreed to go out again for dinner, and I felt a little more chemistry between us just since then...I think it can build up gradually... The only problem I see with feeling that spark right away is that it usually is a euphoric, temporary feeling that might fade in time. For some it may not fade but a majority of the time does. Link to post Share on other sites
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