Does Attitude Towards Breaking Up Make A Difference?

[Young&Sexy21]

I've just recently been broken up with and it hurts. I wish I could go back to the moment she said maybe it'd be best to just be friends; I'd have handled it very differently.

 

So my question is simple. How would it feel if you broke up with your partner because you just didn't feel it any more (as opposed to leaving them for another), and all your partner has to say in response is a cool "okay". And then they disappear, no attempt to sway or persuade you. No "why has this happened?" No "come back, I'll change." No calls at all hours of the night. No calls, period. What does that do in the mind of you, who's called it off?

[loveratud]

That's the same thing I did.

 

I mean, when someone hits you in the face with "I still love you, but I don't feel that I'm "in love" with you anymore," what can you say? Nothing.

 

I said okay. Call me if you change your mind. And walked out.

 

The next day the reality of it all hit me and I wrote the gushing email.

 

So I suppose I can't answer your question. I don't know how that reaction makes them feel.

[notmakingsense]

I've just recently been broken up with and it hurts. I wish I could go back to the moment she said maybe it'd be best to just be friends; I'd have handled it very differently.

 

So my question is simple. How would it feel if you broke up with your partner because you just didn't feel it any more (as opposed to leaving them for another), and all your partner has to say in response is a cool "okay". And then they disappear, no attempt to sway or persuade you. No "why has this happened?" No "come back, I'll change." No calls at all hours of the night. No calls, period. What does that do in the mind of you, who's called it off?

 

I'm assuming that you told her exactly why you you dumped her, so there is no reason for her to ask you "why has this happened?".... If you didn't, you should call her up and tell her what you want from her.

 

If you did tell her why you dumped her, then it might mean that she is hurt and has too much pride to come crawling back to you or it might mean that she isn't "feeling it" any longer either.

[paris38]

is to move on. If she told you she wasn't feeling it anymore, she was telling you how she felt. The writing's on the wall. Walking away cooly is not going to change how she feels inside.

You really can't go back to the moment she broke up with you and speculate if you had only done this, if you had only done that....she told you how she felt about you, that is the bottom line, so you just have to accept it. Don't contact her anymore. It's hard. But 'ya gotta move on with your life.

[Young&Sexy21]

is to move on. If she told you she wasn't feeling it anymore, she was telling you how she felt. The writing's on the wall. Walking away cooly is not going to change how she feels inside.

You really can't go back to the moment she broke up with you and speculate if you had only done this, if you had only done that....she told you how she felt about you, that is the bottom line, so you just have to accept it. Don't contact her anymore. It's hard. But 'ya gotta move on with your life.

 

Solid advice, as usual. Thanks Paris.

[Nanachu]

Yeah, Paris38 is right. It is not really your attitude, but her feeling.

 

I broke up with some guys who left cool. I was all sudden sad since I actually did not have a firm decision and kind of expected them to fight with me. I called them back later...

 

I broke up with some guys who asked me to reconsider. After few weeks, I realized that my decision was not that firm. I picked their calls up and went back together.

 

I broke up with some guys who left cool. I was glad that they did not cry or anything and do not need to see them again. I have never contacted them since.

 

I broke up with some guys who begged, cried, or started to blame on me. I have never contacted them and was glad that I had a cell phone with me at that time in case that I had to call police if they became very bad.