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Should I take a cheating boyfriend back??


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Well, this is one of those stories you need background on.

 

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 years, he has a bit of a drinking problem and used to have a drug (weed only) problem. After a year of dating I found out he had lied to me about drugs so I left him, but we got back together and he hasnt done them since. About one year ago he got really drunk and was in a horrible bar fight where he was charged and everything.... I told him I didnt want him drinking again because I didnt know what he would do to me if he did.

 

Things have been great for the last year, hes been doing very well and we had no problems. However, I just found out that within this last month he started drinking a bit again, and after a rather big fight I found out (From a friend) that he cheated on me. And by cheated I mean everything, the whole kit-n-caboodle. He then had sex with me the next day....

 

The only reason I even considered taking him back was because of how sorry he was. He actually cried, which is something he has done only once and that was when his sister died. Im a complete disaster but I did tell him that the only way I could ever even cosider it was if he did something drastic. although, I dont know if even i could think of something drastic enough for this.

 

Im going to take aweek to myself, if he fights for the relationship then I will probably give it more consideration but if he doesnt- well, I guess my mind will be made up. I know everyone thinks I probably shouldnt give him a chance, but I know for a fact this was the only time.

 

What would you guys consider 'drastic' enough, aside from AA?

What circumstances would you take someone like this back, if any?

What do you guys think would be the smartest thing for me to do under these circumstances?

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How many more times are you going to take him back or even think about it, before you realize, he has to WANT to get help? He has to really want to change his ways and become clean of his drinking and getting his life together. Maybe he might see how serious you are if you DO NOT take him back. You can not help someone who doesn't want to be helped.

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