Why am i a magnet for insecure people?

[Guest]

I dont know why, but lately I've come to a realization that insecure people are attracted to me like a magnet (at work or school). After some reflection, I realized that a lot of my friends are insecure in one way or another.

 

I treat them as equals and include them in anything I do socially, but even so I'm not a social party animal myself. Friends or not, some of them come to me for advice (some open up to me easily), and some seem interested in talking to me but have some kind of wall up (defense?). A lot of times I get occasional glances from people as if they want to talk to me, sometimes they do talk to me and sometimes they dont.

 

any clue?

[CardPlay3r]

Chemistry? Who knows lol...I would enjoy it if I were you

[Pink Amulet]

You seem nice.

 

Approachable and kind.

 

It doesn't sound like a problem to me unless they are irritating you... then I retract my previous statement

 

Do you have stable friends also?

[magichands]

You have too much iron in your diet. Cut back on the spinach.

[Pink Amulet]

Have you taken on a career as a chef, or a dietician perhaps as you seem to be giving a lot of consumption advice of late?

[Guest]

You seem nice.

 

Approachable and kind.

 

It doesn't sound like a problem to me unless they are irritating you... then I retract my previous statement

 

Do you have stable friends also?

 

 

tonite i realized that i really don't have a gurlfriend. end of story.

[Star Gazer]

People are attracted to those who are - or at least seem to be - confident and happy. I'd imagine that's how you resonate with others... I'd be flattered if I were you.

[LN99]

Are you a pretty confident person? Maybe people are drawn to you because you have the qualities that they desire. It's probably an envy thing or they genuinely like you. Be flattered....thats a good thing.

 

Also, I think everyone, including yourself, are insecure in one way or another. It might not be so obvious on some and super obvious on others. No one is perfect. Keep in mind for most of us..."we are our own worst critics."

[ProudPinoyGal01]

I thought most people are insecure down at the core. Maybe that's why they're attracted to you -- it's everyone! I can't tell if this is a bad thing for you or not. If you're trustworthy and kind then people, esp. those who need more trust and kindness, respond to that. It's only a problem when other people's insecurity issues start to affect your own life.

[sb129]

I dont know why, but lately I've come to a realization that insecure people are attracted to me like a magnet (at work or school). After some reflection, I realized that a lot of my friends are insecure in one way or another.

 

I treat them as equals and include them in anything I do socially, but even so I'm not a social party animal myself. Friends or not, some of them come to me for advice (some open up to me easily), and some seem interested in talking to me but have some kind of wall up (defense?). A lot of times I get occasional glances from people as if they want to talk to me, sometimes they do talk to me and sometimes they dont.

 

any clue?

 

You kinda answered your own question in your post.

[Guest]

You seem nice.

 

Approachable and kind.

 

It doesn't sound like a problem to me unless they are irritating you... then I retract my previous statement

 

Do you have stable friends also?

 

There have been a couple people that irritated me, and still do occasionally. There was a guy I hooked up to get a job in the company where I worked (he knows me from the Uni we went to), ironically enough we got laid off at the same time. He just about bugs me during any time he is unemployed or wants something with a higher wage.

 

Stable friends are subjective. As far as reliability goes, half the time they are unreliable. For the most part I have 2 friends im usually on good terms with and hang out. So to answer your question, no i dont really have stable friends.

 

I thought most people are insecure down at the core. Maybe that's why they're attracted to you -- it's everyone! I can't tell if this is a bad thing for you or not. If you're trustworthy and kind then people, esp. those who need more trust and kindness, respond to that. It's only a problem when other people's insecurity issues start to affect your own life.

 

In a way it does affect my life. An instance would be if I wanted to do X activity, but my friends dont want to because they dont have the confidence it takes to try something new - and out of their comfort zone.

Even with my regular friends, even having history and being almost best friends, they seem detached. If they want to do something, in most cases they are afraid to bring up the topic...in most cases us doing something means me bringing it up. they'd rather choose doing nothing or staying at home VS. asking to do something.

 

A lot of times too I get the vibe from people that they're intimidated by me, in affect they become unwilling to strike up a conversation with me. But it doesnt mean down thel ine they wont. And ironically enough these people know my name, yet half the time I dont (poor memory).

 

As a result of most of this, I've become somewhat a loner. And for the same reason Im not good at making friends for the reasons above.