need the help of some men here

[honeybunnyz22]

ok i will start off by saying i went out the past weekend to a club. When i first entered i say this unbelivable guy standing at the bar so we made some eye contact. I ordered my drink and went to check out the club. We went to the second floor ( my cousin and i) and we were kinda dancing and i look straight across the club and there is the guy from the bar, and he was definatly watching me a little bit. I laughed and told my cousin he was my challenge for the night . Then we deceided to walk around and see who all was there.

 

We deceided to sit down on this brick ledge and just kinda chill for a few min. while we waited for a good song to come on, and out of the corner of my eye i saw the guy and his friend approaching us . His friend came over a was trying to talk to my cousin and she was not hearing it. I am sitting there and i started a conversation with him and just firgured he was pretty shy. Not thinking too much of the situation a song came on and my cousin Amy whips me off to the dancefloor so i kinda said maybe we will catch you later and smiled. We danced a god 4 0r 5 songs then went back up to the bar to get another drink, when he like just appears out of know where and asks me if he could by me a drink so i accepted. Then this guy and i ended up dancing for the rest of the night. It was unbelivable!!!!!

 

There was a point when we were sooo hot from all the dancing. I guess he knew the owner of the club and thought it would be cool to take me to the beer cooler to cool off and i loved it, but did not stay but a couple of min. not wanting to be pinned in a cooler that could have been locked or something.

 

So we sat down and talked for a few min and danced some more, then before you know it they are screaming last call. Sooooo it was that awkward time of the night. Well i am definatly not wanting to go home with him because he was the type of guy i would have liked to get to know a little more.

 

So he of course asked me what i was doing and i replied by saying i was going home he said that was cool, and he was very serious about giving me his number. I did not have anything to write with and of i did not have my phone to enter it in. So he decided to take my number and said he would call the next day.

 

My problem is he never ended up calling and i dont know if he just was looking for someone to go home with for the night, or if he is just the shy guy who would rather me call him. I am really trying to firgue this one out, he was sooooo my type, funny , cute well at least what i could learn about him in a few hours at a dance club. So i was kinda wanting your advice on the subject of what he might have been thinking? He did not appear to be very drunk by any means and neither did i. He seemed really intrested in me and i let him know i was intrested in him too!

 

Do you think i should go to the same club in hopes of running into him again or should i just let this one go.

 

I would really appreciate any insight on this one guys

Thanks

[HokeyReligions]

Did you exchange numbers, or does he only have your number? I'm a little confused.

 

If he gave you his number, then give him a call. In this day and age women don't have to wait for the man to initiate a date. The worst he will say is "no" and so what -- you offered and if he's not interested then don't waste your time and energy on him.

 

If he has your number -- don't sit by the phone. If he wants to see you again he will call. If he doesn't -- don't sweat it, obviously he is not interested and you don't need to waste your time or energy thinking about him.

 

He sounds to me like what we used to call "cruisers" and was just looking for a meaningless quickie.

[honeybunnyz22]

no he only has my number i did not have anything to take his number with thats why i am so confused becase he was wanting me to take his number before he asked for mine

[clia]

He wanted you to take his number so he wouldn't bear the *shudder* burden and *shudder* responsibility of having to be the one to call. This could be shyness, laziness, or he could be the kind of guy who prefers to be chased so he doesn't have to expend the effort, since girls will chase him with little prodding.

 

I think there's nothing wrong with going back there in the hopes of seeing him, but don't go there every night or anything. Write it off, and if you see him again, great, and if not, that's fine too since you barely know him.

 

But if you do see him, let him approach you. After all, he's the one who didn't call. At this point, it's 50/50 that he either lost your number and couldn't call (at which point he will RUN up to you, thrilled to see you again), or that he just chose not to call. Right now, you have no idea which is the case, so don't risk making a fool of yourself by hanging all over him and acting completely thrilled to see him. After all, he didn't call!

 

Play it cool if you see him again!

[Just A Girl2]

Okay, so he wanted to give you HIS #, but you had nothing to write it down with and no cell phone to enter it into...okay, I follow you so far. So, instead, he asked for YOUR number. So how did he record your number? Did HE have a cell phone that he entered it into (memory) or something to write it down with? If it's the latter, then why didn't you use that same writing utensil to write his down with?

 

Just trying to get the facts, wondering if maybe he didn't have anything to record your # with either, and he thought he could 'memorize it' in his head, but forgot it.

 

So what's the scoop here?

[honeybunyz22]

ok he entered my number in his phone. so i know that he either entered it in wrong or is just not intrested in calling back, or he is just shy and thinks that i am not intrested in him. Either way it really sucks because i cant stop thinking about him. I usually dont feel like this after meeting someone out at a bar, but we just had this crazy chemistry. I have been looking for that feeling for a long time, so i am just dumb founded that he did not call.

 

I just cant firgure out why he was so pursuassive on me having his number before he took mine. I guess what clia said makes the most sense. I just have never really dealt with rejection. i have always had who i wanted so i guess that is another reason why this might be bothering me so much too.

 

Do you think i should go back to the same club this weekend, and if i do see him let him approach me and see what his reaction is, and go from there. I just hope he was not thinking i was gonna go home with him that night and that was all he was intrested in.

Well that will be my luck that he just did not call back for that reason.

[Ally Boo]

Guys have those weird rules about calling girls. Don't stress it...if he calls, great...if not, you'll probably run into him somewhere, then ask him. Here's a thought...sometimes, I'll enter a number in my phone, and if I dont hit this certain button, it doesn't save....I've caught myself do that several times. So don't jump to conclusions. Just chill...

[honyeybunnyz22]

Well i just wanted to post the latest news with the guy and the phone number mix up. I ended up going to the same club and i did run into him. I definatly played it cool and he said he went to call me the next day and he did not hit the button to save the number soooooo i somewhat belived him and he was definatly very happy to see me so i told him he could have a second chance. We had more of a conversation this time, and i am definatly not feeling like he is just trying to take me home.

He seemed to be alot more of friends were there this time and they were all giving him the ok kinda non directly, but i could still tell what was going on. Anyway we will see what happens this time and hopefully it will end in a good thing. Thanks for all the acvice everyone till next time

[Bill]

That's funny...

 

Word of advice. Shy guys don't goto clubs.

[honeybunnys22]

ok latest news------ he called on Mon but i was not around to take the call so tues he called again and we talked for about 45 minutes and we have palns for tonight...woooohoooo hopefully things gor well wish me luck!!!!

[honeybunnyz22]

ok well the first date went really good!!!!

We had both had a pretty long day so we decided to watch a movie at one of his friends house. I was unbelivably comfortable with him almost in a creepy way. It felt like we had been dating for like 6 months or something. He was very cuddly and rubbed my shoulders and played with my hair. We shared a bowl of ice cream and just relaxed. It was so perfect. He was not too pushy and when it came time for me to go home we were sitting in his car and he was talking about the next time we go out it will be more exciting and yada yada. Then he just grabbed the back of my neck very gently and slowly and just gave me a really nice kiss on the lips. He did not shove his tonge down my throat which i greatly appreciated. lol it was like that fairy tale kiss that you wait for that one person of your dreams to give ya.

 

Then on sat. he called to see what i was going to be doing for the night, and i told him i had kinda had plans with my cousin to go to the same club where i had met him and everything. He said that was cool and to call him if my plans changed or anything and to let him know later what i was going to be doing for sure.

I called him around 700 and told him where i was going and that he should come if he was not going to be doing anything else.

He then explained that he would probably not be there for the fact that i was going to be out with the girls and he did not want to intrude on that, but to call him back later.

 

Well of course after having a few to many drinks i called him and told him that he should come and dance with me for a little while.

He said ok and that he would be there in a few min.

Well like a half and hour later i ran into him, and by this time it was getting close to last call and everything. We ended up dancing a couple of songs together. Well my cousin ended up leaving with a couple of her guy friends and he asked me what i was gonna do and if i wanted to come over to his house.

Of coarse i could not say no, and i knew it was not a good idea for the fact that we had both been drinking all night and sex was bound to happen. My next problem is i think i may have really messed things up by sleeping with him sooooooo soon. It is completly not my personatlity at all. The more we have talked and my god we have only had one date!!!!!

This man is someone who i am very attracted too and i love his personality. I could definatly see myself with him in the long run.

I guess i am just wondering if he is thinking that i am a big old slut or if guys have kinda gotten over that since there are sooooo many woman now who use men just for the sex too.

It was a very passionate experience we were so in tune with eachother it felt like we had been together before. I have never really have experienced sex like that with someone whom i hardly know anything about. He held me all night long and in the morning he took me to get my car and he was not acting any different so i am assuming that he is ok with what happend. He said he was gonna call me later in the day, but of coarse my phone never rang at least not from him. I just really cant stand the fact of waiting trying to firgure out what might be going through his mind about me. I just dont want him to think that is me on a normal basis ya know.

He was just sooooooo irresistable and i really needed him at that momment ya know. I am just hoping that since i did not leave with him the first couple of nights that we met at the bar that he knows that it was definatly more in the fact that i really like him and would like to get to know him better and that i just could not help myself.

 

If anyone can give me some insight on this or just some words to have someone to talk about this with i would appreciate it.

I have not been in the dating thing for a while so this is all werid for me lol

I guess i just kinda need to know if i should be playing the game or let him know that i am definatly intrested in seeing where this might go. Do i need to play a little hard to get or go with how i feel!! My intution has never been stronger about something like this i just feel like this is the guy i am gonna marry or something. Has anyone else had anything like this before. I guess almost like love at first sight. Anyway i am just rammbling on and on so i am curious what everyone else has to say

Thanks Honeybunnyz22

[butterflyz]

i have mixed reactions to your question. i have been married (twice) and each guy was not the kind of guy that would think a woman was a slut for sleeping with them on the first date. i waited a month with both.

 

some guys like to play the game and like to collect notches on their pant belts. from what you said, it sounds like he likes you.

but, like you said, he didn't call.

 

it is very hard to tell. i know one guy who waited for how long it took to sleep with someone, and then dumped her. you never really know. but, a good rule of thumb is to talk about sex, sexual relationships before you do the dirty deed. to see where they are coming from. but, that doesn't help you now. i have been in that situation myself.

 

i hope he calls and i hope he treats you kindly. the next time you see him you can bring it up and see how he feels about sex and having sex quickly in a relationship and what having sex means. for some guys its something they do regardless of how they feel about the woman, some men only have sex with someone if they really dig the woman.

 

i really hope it works out.

[honeybunnyz22]

thanks butterflyz

 

 

He did call tonight and it went well we made plans for this weekend. He wants to cook me dinner so that sounds good. I guess i can relax a little now and we talked about what happened and he said he is normally not like that with most women but just felt the chemistry also. I told him i would call him sometime this weekend and he told me that i could call during the week too so all is good and i hope this all works out for the best if anything maybe i just found a really cool guy to hang out with.