RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Well well well, what a turn of events! So it was 11pm on a rather uneventful Valentines Day, and who texts me? Of course, its the ex! "Hi, is it ok if i ring you? would be gd to hear your voice and see how you are. K" Not 10 mins later, whilst im still in shock, she rings. I dont answer. Then i get: "Guess not.. well hopefully we'll talk soon" What the feck!!! What does this mean, what do I do? I cant even think straight. I need some objective views because i know i cant think for sh*t atm, so im not paying any attention to myself. Confused Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
shockandawed Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 WOW Rocket!!! Looks like a possible sleepless night for you. Ok, listen to me and the others that follow. First of all, you know I have screwed up in this dept, so learn from my mistakes. DO NOTHING TONIGHT!!!!! My initial guess is the twisted bch just wanted to see if you were doing anything on VD. Don't give her any satisfaction there. And of course you are wondering why she is calling, didnt she have anything to do? There isn't an answer here that is going to make you feel any better. If and only if you feel confident, then maybe send her a text back tomorrow. Something along the lines, nice to hear from you, hope all is well. You have to come across as indifferent and moving along. If you cant do that, then DO NOTHING!!!! Trust me, I got an IM this morning as well. Of course, that isnt that unusual but I have been avoiding talking to her lately. I was right, strictly curious if I had plans tonight. She still doesnt know. Don't get on this rollercoaster. Vent here anytime you feel the urge to talk to her, she owes you a lot more begging before you grant that to her. Don't make me fly over the pond and kick your butt. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGG!!!!! I'm not gonna do anything, I don't want to talk to her. There are only two situations i can handle.... I never see her ever again (as has been the case with all my exs - never seen them again, not once.)She makes a massive apology attemptAnything else will only destroy me. Im not going to be dragged into this torment. I will not. I am stronger than this. Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
shockandawed Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Good, keep repeating that!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 Good, keep repeating that!!!! Will do. Nice one on the quick reply Soooo helped! What time is it where you are? its 10 to 1 here Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
mishy Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 don't reply to the stupid cow. Make her work for it. You said you wanted a massive apology. Don't accept any less. Yes i think she was wanting to see if you were with anyone on valentines. If you let her in now, she'll treat you like crap. Make her S W E A T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D ps. make sure you drag this out as long as possible and enjoy the attention. Its sweet sweet revenge watching them struggle back. Do it for all us dumpees on loveshack. For ALL dumpees of the world.....! hang on, were YOU the one actually dumped?? i can't remember... Link to post Share on other sites
polywog Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Geez, Rocket!! Not only does she owe you a massive apology, she needs to become a completely different person! unlikely.... If I were you I'd bite the bullet and Not Reply, not at all, even tho it would lead to some very exciting posts for us to read tomorrow. Stay Strong. polywog Link to post Share on other sites
polywog Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Do it for all us dumpees on loveshack. For ALL dumpees of the world.....! hang on, were YOU the one actually dumped?? i can't remember... ...Yes, Rocket...you Owe us for all the fab advice we suffering dumpees have been giving to you....make her suffer... please, we are counting on you... Link to post Share on other sites
guin_girl Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Stay Strong RM2... you are in good company, we are all right there with you... and awesome advice S&A.... Link to post Share on other sites
shockandawed Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Yes Rocket, We are all on your shoulders, be the one we needed to be!!! LOL!!! BTW, Its about 7:20 here right now, Central time zone, I think London is 6 hours ahead. Off to a friends bar for a Corona or two. I better not get back on here and find you cracked. LOL!!!! BTW, thanks GG, nice to know I can do somethings right. Link to post Share on other sites
notmakingsense Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 For not responding! As has been pointed out, she's just checking to see if you are "occupied" on Valentine's Day. Thanks to your good judgement, she's now the one tossing and turning over what you might be up to! Most will suggest you not contact her at all in the future. But, if you find an irresistable urge to text her, just a simple: "Hi, got your text last night. Thanks. Hope you are well." Then, back to NC. Again, congratulations! Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 She's just sniffing to make sure "Plan B" is still available. Follow the advice of others and DO NOT REPLY TO HER. The two options you listed are the only viable ones and she's hinted at neither. If option two isn't it (and I don't think it is) then let her go. Silence is a friend who will not betray you. Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Well, let's see, in the past year I've got several "I miss yous", "it hurts so much", "I miss our fights", "I miss our friendship", one out of the blue phone call because my blog said I was really upset about something.... etc etc etc. Not to burst your bubble, but exes do this. Maybe you're "Plan B", maybe they just need a little "you" fix to help them on their own path to healing, maybe they genuinely miss you. The truth is, the only thing that matters is hearing the words "I want to try again". It's ok man, a lot of us want to hear those words. You aren't alone. Link to post Share on other sites
lovelorcet Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Stay NC!!!!!! Even if you have to fight her off with a stick in front of your door. She is most likely just feeling a bit lonely and needed someone to give her a little ego boost. Stay away, and stay NC. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 I know i know. Thanks for the telling! The only thing thats bugging me is what if she is wanting to try again? I have to give her the benefit of the doubt. How do I intice her to let me know this, without giving her the 'ego boost' if that is indeed her intention? She needs to just come out and say "i want to try again, lets talk", but i know thats unrealistic. What do i do? Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
lovelorcet Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 If she truly and really wanted to try again and to be a different person then all of Hell couldn't hold her back. I seriously doubt this is the case. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 I dont need this I hate not knowing whats going on or how to act Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
guin_girl Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 What do i do? You are going to have to ignore the fact she called... if she really wants to get back with you, you need to make her work for it. One call is not even close... You are worth way more than for her to "test" call on a glorified holiday. Don't let her games get to you, stand strong... Link to post Share on other sites
alasia Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 I agree. If she really wants to try again she'll phone you again - wait for the second or maybe third phonecall and then think about reacting. For now, do nothing. It'll get her thinking and stop you driving yourself mad Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 FFS (((( I agree with everyone here, thanks for the support I know theres the argument that if she doesnt go miles out her way to get me back, then she obviously doesnt want it bad enough so it would never work, and Im 99% on board that train of thought. Trust me, she WILL need to make this effort for me to forgive her, or ill tell her to clear off. But, there is a flipside which I cant just ignore... She could quite easilly mistake my healing-NC for bitter ignorance and give up before shes had a chance to decide to make a big effort. Am i crazy? Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
alasia Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 If she gives up then she wasn't worth it anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
shockandawed Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Yes, Rocket, you are crazy. But so am I and many others. I know way too well what you are going through. Remember what happened to me? Saturday, a week back? I was on the third date with a nice girl. Get a text from the ex about liking the wine we made. I sent one text back simply thanking her. Then another right back asking if I was on a date. This went back and forth until I finally ditched the girl and went home to call her. My mind went crazy because I knew she was alone on a Saturday night and thought it was my one chance to pull her in. We talked for a couple of hours on the phone, agreed to try to figure out a way to make it work, on and on...she was sick Sunday and by Monday, back to not talking to me. I wished I would have had access to this group that Saturday night, and I wished I had stopped responding after the thank you, but I didn't. In hindsight, she would have kept working. But I also know it would take an act of God for us to be able to get back together and it work out. If you can stop with a simple Thank you text then do it. But please, don't give her any insight to anything else. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 Shes not going to have changed sufficiently is she, lets be honest. Why is she contacting me? How did you guys read the tone of "guess not, well hopefully we'll talk soon" miinddddd gammmesssss :'( Now I'm sat here waiting for 'soon'. When's it gonna be? Is she gonna be texting me again? I thought VD would be an end to this all and let me relax, knowing there are no future events giving reason for contact. Now im all worked up again Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
shockandawed Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Shes not going to have changed sufficiently is she, lets be honest. Why is she contacting me? As Cali said, see if Option B is still available. How did you guys read the tone of "guess not, well hopefully we'll talk soon" miinddddd gammmesssss :'( Yes, mind games, putting a little guilt on you for not taking the call. Now I'm sat here waiting for 'soon'. When's it gonna be? Is she gonna be texting me again? I thought VD would be an end to this all and let me relax, knowing there are no future events giving reason for contact. Now im all worked up again Rocket Rocket, You have two choices as I see it. #1- Continue NC - It will keep her guessing, but it may appear to her that you are hiding and weak, or possibly didn't get her message. #2-Brief Thank You text - My choice here only to show her indifference. The key is to stop it right there. You aren't afraid to respond, no hurry, but not afraid. She is still unclear as to your status, and she has confirmed a source of communication SHOULD she decide to go further. AGAIN, the key is to stop it at that and give NO information about your status. It will be damn hard because you want to know her intentions. Trust me and the others, if her intentions are there, she will make sure they come in loud and clear at some point. Text "Thanks for the txt, hope all is well with you" Link to post Share on other sites
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 Thanks for the reply shocked She text me asking to speak to me tho, theres not anything to say thankyou for? Rocket Link to post Share on other sites
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