adnCat Posted February 20, 2007 Share Posted February 20, 2007 I have a huge family and I was thinking that a good excuse to shrink the guestlist would be to have a destination wedding with my immediate family and a handful of close friends only. Then have an informal picnic type celebration for everyone when we get back. Compared to a traditional wedding, what do people think of destination weddings? Are they a smart way to save and keep it simple? Are they just a popular way to exclude people and irritate those who can't afford to fly out? What do you guys think? Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted February 20, 2007 Share Posted February 20, 2007 I think they're a great idea, and practical to boot. Where I grew up, the girls would plan these huge-*ss weddings with up to 8-9 bridesmaids WITH accompanying groomsmen, and really, that was overboard, IMO. There was my one classmates whose guestlist was over 2000 invites … my best friend (who was a bridesmaid) said she overheard an older couple tell the usher it didn't matter where they sat – they didn't know either the bride or the groom, but got the invitation from someone who worked with the older married man! Turns out the bride was the connection, but I thought that kind of lost the whole effect of the wedding celebration. but I digress: I've always thought destination weddings were a smart way to do things if you weren't tied into a church ceremony. That way you can keep the guest list intimate and can just focus on the ceremony itself. I'm sure you can find some great package deals for travel and lodging, too. Having a separate, larger reception for everyone focuses on that particular event. The best part is that the wedding couple doesn't suffer from burnout on what should be a happy, memorial day. (And it can be as low-key as you want, too.) do you have any ideas in mind where you'd like for the wedding to take place? Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted February 20, 2007 Share Posted February 20, 2007 Are they just a popular way to exclude people and irritate those who can't afford to fly out? don't worry about those people – that's what the separate blow-out reception is for! If they gripe, you don't have to explain yourself because YOU'RE THE BRIDE!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author adnCat Posted February 20, 2007 Author Share Posted February 20, 2007 quankanne- thanks for the response!! We are thinking maybe Hawaii. We have a good amount saved up and could afford a traditional wedding, but it just isn't our style. We might spend an equal amount flying our families out there. But I don't want a circus of a wedding, I want something special and memorable and to our taste. Should we send out announcements before the wedding and inform them that an invite for a stateside celebration will follow? OR should we do the wedding first, then send out announcements that we have married and we want them to join us for a backyard barbeque to celebrate? Link to post Share on other sites
bab Posted February 21, 2007 Share Posted February 21, 2007 Hey adnCat-- I was going to send you a PM with some links to pictures of some friends who did just what you are suggesting, for the same reasons, but alas, you don't have PM capabilities. I'll just say that it was the perfect idea. The wedding was soooo low stress and more beautiful than any other I've been to, even my own. The got married on Oahu, and it was great and actually very cheap. They are super super low key people, so they just had the grooms brother perform the ceremony. He was supposed to get ordained online so that it would be legal, but the paper work didn't come through in time. So the day before they went to a place that was basically doing drive by weddings, got legally hitched, and had the ceremony the next day. They got their flowers from Chinatown in Honolulu the day of the wedding, including fresh lei's for all the women, and an orchid bouquet for the bride and maid of honor, and petals to scatter for the aisle. I think the total flower bill was under 50 bucks. We found a somewhat fairly secluded beach, and we drove up as a caravan. We brought sheets from the hotel and the girls all held them up while the maid of honor helped the bride get dressed behind the sheets. For the reception, we called a nearby nice restaurant earlier in the week and just asked for reservations for a table to 12. Poof. Instant reception. It was amazingly romantic and not stressful at all. The only downside was that the video camera and the really nice camera that was suppossed to be official wedding photos got stolen out of the car the next day. So, no wedding video or super good quality photos, but there were enough of the point and shoot cameras around that got some good shots that were not stolen. The picnic afterwards was a ton of fun, and she got to wear her wedding dress again, not to many brides get to do that!! They had a picture slide show set to music of the ceremony. It was awesome. Her mom made a cake and my H's little brother DJ'd. They did have it catered, but not with fancy food. The place where they had the picnic was at a photo gallery, owned by a local photographer. He actually came out and took pictures and didn't charge for them! Anyway, I loved my wedding which was the picnic style but not destination, but if you ask my advice: Go to Hawaii!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author adnCat Posted February 21, 2007 Author Share Posted February 21, 2007 bab- thanks so much for the reply! That does sound like a really nice event, and mine would be ideally be very similar. I really am leaning towards this, but we will have to see how much things will cost and find out more details. Link to post Share on other sites
Vchica99 Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 adnCat, One of the most profound moments at my wedding was when my H and I sat down to dinner at our reception (just a table for two, not the HUGE family table) and looked around the room and commented about how we knew, intimately knew, every person in that room. Granted, we didn't do the destination thing, but we did have the sense to keep it small. There weren't any business associates, long lost cousins, friends of friends OR even any co-workers. I just loved the fact that we were so close to everyone who was there. Made for a great party! Link to post Share on other sites
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