Never begin a new relationship until you've fully moved on from the one before.
Also never begin a new relationship with someone who hasn't fully moved on from their one before.
By 'moved on,' I mean any necessary grieving done, not preoccupied with the ex, enjoying life, feeling good about yourself, and optimistic about the future.
The best way to move on is to decide to be single for a while; not dating, not hooking up, no fwb. Some short term counselling if that appeals to you.
'G
To part now and parting now,
Never to meet again;
To have done for ever; I and thou,
With joy, and so with pain.
It is too hard, too hard to meet
If we trust love no more;
Those other meetings were too sweet
That went before.
And I would have, now love is over,
An end to all, an end:
I cannot, having been your lover,
Stoop to become your friend.
— ARTHUR SYMONS.
When I removed a person who deeply hurt me from my life, I did something I'd never done before.
I promised myself that I would never again speak that persons name.
I never have.
I've found it to be very empowering.
Recommended.
The fundamental truths of Taoism:
Things change.
People change.
Situations change.
Nothing ever remains the same.
What is most important is to adapt to these changes as completely as possible.
You are now a single person, so you have to restructure your life so that being single is enjoyable, rewarding, and fulfilling.
Look at all the possibilities that are now open to you because you are single.
Don't sit and look into the hole where your girlfriend/boyfriend used t
Even though it's been years I still think about you. I've asked myself a number of times why you are the one person that I keep with me and realized it is a question without an answer for describing what makes you special is impossible. Words such as amazing, incredible or spectacular just won't cut it. Even in a crowd of thousands of women I still would have been able to make you out and only had eyes for you.
No, all I know is that at one point I loved and wanted you with every fiber of my
Unfaithful married men are especially good at two things:
1. Telling lies.
2. Finding people who will believe those lies.
Many of them do this again and again with woman after woman.
These are the rules which guarantee success in OLD:
1. Never ever answer a text or message.
2. If you're disinterested, act interested.
3. If you're interested, act disinterested.
4. Only kiss on the 11th, 2nd, or 19th dates.
5. Always take your ex along on dates.
6. Always be honest about how many people you are exclusively dating.
Never been known to fail.
You have to let yourself fall into your own arms.
Be there 100% for yourself, in a totally loving relationship.
Everything we experience with other people has roots in the relationship we have with ourselves.
When get that relationship sorted out, our relationships with others are simple and full of joy.
You could call it a return to innocence.
To really heal, its necessary to overcome the feeling of incompleteness that underlies everything. That feeling of incompleteness can only be remedied by Being, in the fullest sense of Being. We have to give birth to ourselves, and grow up all over again.
People get lost in events, and their personal history of events.
"So and so happened, and that's why I feel like this."
The above is an untruth.
The feeling is real, but the explanation isn't.
There isn't a valid because.
Rebound relationships are fuelled by a desperate attempt to escape the pain caused by loss.
"Smallness, dependence, separateness, feeling you have injured your good object, are all fairly obvious to the eye and not easily denied if one is facing reality. But reality is pretty painful much of the time in childhood, even when you have an intact family that is living harmoniously. Most children naturally gravitate to wishful ideas, the most fundamental of all being the idea that there is magic,
"Your ability to take action, be effective, influence your own life, and assume responsibility for your behavior are important elements in what you bring to a relationship. This sense of agency is essential for you to feel in control of your life: to believe in your capacity to influence your own thoughts and behavior, and have faith in your ability to handle a wide range of tasks or situations. Having a sense of agency influences your stability as a separate person; it is your capacity to be ps
“And so we use them (people) for a kind of pleasure which can be called "fun." But it is not the creative kind of fun often connected with play; it is, rather, a shallow, distracting, greedy way of "having fun." And it is not by chance that it is that type of fun which can easily be commercialized, for it is dependent on calculable reactions, without passion, without risk, without love. Of all the dangers that threaten our civilization, this is one of the most dangerous ones: the escape from one
It doesn't matter what they are doing.
You are what matters.
Focus on yourself.
Your thoughts matter.
Your feelings matter.
Your healing matters.
Your journey through life matters.
Your hopes matter.
Your fears matter.
Your dreams matter.
Your learning matters.
Your realisations matter.
Your growth matters.
Your understanding of yourself matters.
Your return to happiness matters.
You can't fill the emptiness from outside.
You used your ex to temporarily patch the emptiness, but that can only ever be a temporary fix.
You should cultivate feelings of loving kindness for yourself and others inside yourself.
Cultivate empathy and compassion towards yourself and others inside yourself.
That is the only way you can permanently fill the emptiness.
(From a recent thread; not applicable to everyone.)
Whenever I hear someone talking about "fighting" for someone, it always makes me wonder what they mean...
Who do you fight, and with which weapons?
Very often, it seems to be case that this "fighting for," just means an attempt to persuade someone who doesn't want to be with them, to want to be with them.
I see that is a big problem.
Our wants are mostly determined by internal processes, often below the level of conscious thoug
