Each day, I feel as if something is stopping me from becoming a better person. Is it anger issues? Low self-esteem? Laziness? Stubbornness?
Sometimes I wonder if I am not taking enough responsibility for myself and that I'm being too reactive. I think I need to be more proactive - a lot more proactive. I should really read that book, "7 Habits of Highly Effective People".
Other times I wonder if I am really beaten down by anger and being overly suspicious of others. I know I need to stop s
I never was a good person. I wasn't even a bad person either. I drifted between both, I guess. I had been told as a child that I was a bad person because I wasn't what my parents wanted me to be. Because I was unhappy in an unhappy home, I became moody, cranky and even bad tempered. That led to me being frequently called a grouchy kid, a bitch, and that I had a nasty attitude.
I would try to prove that I was a good person. That made me eager to please others and also convince myself that I wa
The whole reason why I came to LoveShack was to meet others trying to personally improve and heal whatever haunts/harms them. I also wanted to share my experience and evolution with others, so I can be supported, albeit online. I'm part of other forums, but I needed a place where I can freely discuss my personal development. So here I am
I'll try not to flood my journal with entries. If I do, it is because I had a bad day. But hopefully, I'll learn to reign myself in.
Take care!
I am playing in a chess tournament during this long weekend of Thanksgiving. The tournament takes place very near where MiMi lives, so I thought a lot about her when I was driving there....
My results so far are not too bad, as I haven't played since 2006. I got 3 wins and 2 losses so far. MiMi, there are so many things that I want to tell you. Whenever I won a game, I want to share my happiness with you. Same when I lost a game, I want to let you know how angry I was. Anyway, today this is l
I am glad to have found this LoveShack forum. Instead of releasing all my thoughts and telling all kinds of stories and past experiences to my friends (yes, they were annoyed), I think it is best for me to write down my recovery journey in this Journal.
Here's a very brief situation about my situation: My ex-girlfriend MiMi dumped me, and for the first few weeks, I did most of things that dumpees should not do, such as begging, pleading, kept texting and calling, etc. On Aug 30th, my ex texte
Not going as expected but I'm taking it as a test; he no longer wants to be my friend he said he will cut me off his life. I believe he has the power to do just that but I refuse to believe this is how it will end. Staying strong and still believing but not neglecting myself while this is happening. I choose to believe, i choose happiness.
Is my mind and love powerful enough to attract him back to my life and make him happy?
I wonder.... 1st month, first experiment, we'll see how far I've gone; as of now he has said he's confused, has slept with his best friend, a woman he knows since they were 14 years of age. Has told me he loves me but doesn't know what he truly wants in his life, only wishes to be my friend.
I want him to be happy, find his answers and want to be my partner for life. I wish he'll cut all contact with th
Dreams which give our life meaning and inspire us to change. We can dream about change and improvement, we can set goals, seemingly impossible goals but, goals which challenge us, and we can dream about the future, when we will reach our goals, when our lives will change for the better. Without our dreams, Life and humanity would be hopelessly dull.
A place where everybody knew my name. A place I could be little old Mea. A thank you for LS. For lessons learned and hardships overcome through my own strength, the support of others here. To come back stronger, wiser and with a deeper appreciation for everything in life is a wonderful feeling! Thank you people. Thank you.
So, my boyfriend and I have been together for 4.5 years. A few days before Christmas of 2012, I moved in with him. So we have been living together for 8 months now. We have to move out of our place by next weekend. He told me a few weeks ago that we have to move and a week later he says he wants to move to a new place by himself. I've been trying to figure out why he doesn't want to live with me. So then, he tells me that I haven't been paying rent, which is true. I was going to school until May
So we're here.
Things are starting to come along. There's a slight sense of progress, and it should feel rewarding..but of course it doesn't. Especially when you look at how much further you have to go.
The funny part is I don't even know what that fully entails. So many years have been spent floating around, going in no specific path, with no direction. Like a ship with no control over which way it sails.
Recalling nights where there's that feeling of emptiness have become just a bit t
It was about two years ago when i met you. I was still pretty fresh out of college, and the economy wasn't performing well. During my months of joblessness, and a shot of boredom, I decided to see what's up with people from around the world.
It was in that place where you caught my eye. You were so funny, friendly, and warm. One day you decided to add me on facebook. I still chuckle that your reason was that 'you loved my smile.'
And you.. you were drop dead gorgeous. With some of the most
Failed relationships, always gets left behind, honestly I am tired of loving and getting hurt. My oldest sister is single for life, and my seconds marriage is not going well. I get dumped by a man who used me although arguable I know it was stupid of me to let myself get used. But really I cannot see myself trusting men ever again in terms of a long term romantic relationship. Lately I'm trying to do online dating but when the time comes when they want to meet, I always back out cause at the bac
When is the last time you have been just honest with yourself?
I mean honest.
The kind of honesty that extends past social situations. That part of you that is fully in tune with how you feel. But for some reason or another, it never expresses itself.
It's suppressed.
Hidden.
Pushed away.
Perceived as imaginary.
We do it everyday. Pretend like everything is ok. That we're exactly where we want to be in life. That everything is 'hunky dory' or described with some other adjective
It's only fair I make this the first one.
__________
I wanted to type this before I fell asleep because that's when my mind seems to be most open. I'd put it in a journal on here, but I don't how. Either way, let's go:
You know, it's crazy.
It's crazy how so many chapters in your life can all of a sudden open and close at the same time.
So many of the things you've experienced over time, whether positive or negative, finally begin to show their conclusions. You're finally
The last time I spoke to my ex was end of last year and even ran into her a few months after, which was extremely frustrating and disheartening. I Stopped talking to my ex though, no contact for about five to six months. Was very upset and still struggling to move on. She broke up with me more than a year ago, but we still saw each other and reminisced and I tried to make things work, but she wasn't having it and eventually told me to stop contacting her. At this point I gave in and stopped cont
I don't get it? Why can't you have them with him? The only reason I don't get there is because of lack of attractio/chemistry.
Can you orgasm with him at all?
Dude, that's not how to think about sex. The fact that you are making it a
"left brain" subject of analysis in terms of times and numbers is what often kills sex. It has to be a "right brain" experience of free fantasy and unconstrained indulgment of contributing feeling and thoughts to lead to satisfaction. Both men and women can have sexual impediments until they come out of the dominance of numbers and time--how long foreplay? how long penetration? how many down strokes? how many upstrokes?
