Right now I am simply enjoying my family. I feel like I am myself. Something I haven't felt for more than a year. I hope to talk to my favorite 5 again, that is if they still want to. They have been good to me and offered much help, some I could not take at the time, but now I can get something out of it.
I started to gain weight back in October, but got myself turned around quite well. I really started investing time in my body as well as mind, and I am doing really really well. (Finally, i ca
That is correct. Just the beginning of this month, I realized I am totally over my EA. I know, many others on LS wish they could get over their EA's they know that are no good for them.
I don't know exactly how I did it, or what happened, but I have some guesses.
First, I know what you may be thinking: My EA wasn't really that strong. Well, I have to disagree. It was. Anyone that I discussed it with knows so. My EA would always be in my mind. I'd get those internal rushes, etc. Believe me
[sIZE=3][COLOR=#000000][FONT=Times New Roman]THE LS EXPERIENCE[/FONT][/COLOR][/sIZE]
[sIZE=3][COLOR=#000000][FONT=Times New Roman]During such talks among my few LS friends, I was learning to become more open with myself. More honest if you will. One very good LS'r demanded it pretty much. Or at least since they adopted that behavior, I adopted that frame of mind of being honest with oneself and what is going on. [/FONT][/COLOR][/sIZE]
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THE LS EXPERIENCE
During such talks among my few LS friends, I was learning to become more open w/ith myself. More honest if you will. One very good LS'r demanded it pretty much. Or at least since they adopted that behavior, I adopted that frame of mind of being honest with oneself and what is going on.
And, to my surprise, I embraced it.
It can be quite addicting. In fact, that honest state of mind carried over when I communicated with the Chinese woman for the month of July.
Of course, a common question that many ask is 'Why don't you just get divorced if you are so unhappy in your marriage?'
First of all, every marriage is different as well as every divorce is different. I'm not going to discuss what a happy marriage should be. If everyone here had happy marriages/relationships, they probably would not be on LS in the first place.
'You are so unhappy! Don't stay married for the kids because it isn't fair and you are living a lie and they will feel more
You know, I don't think marriage is for everyone. Growing up I thought I did. But now I realize I think it's an outdated concept from history that needs to be shelved or at least not so encouraged.
Think about it: Even from Biblical writings, there is much talk of marriage when you are young, and brothers marrying sister in laws with the husbands died, etc. People died quicker back then. Much quicker. And I'm pretty sure its to protect assets, land and belongings and build wealth.
You
DARK TIME:
Yes, at this point I felt pretty abandoned. I lost my RL EA (Chinese friend), I was barely chatting with my LS friends (my workplace restricted access), and that one LS'r was becoming a pest. Not much I could do since they were friends with a mod and apparently I had a friendship with someone that bothered them for some reason.
Again, it was getting tiresome, exhausting, and it was going to cause others a headache if I hung around. I'm the type that gives people enough rope to ha
HISTORY
This journal is for me and just to get crap off my chest. So stop reading if you expect more.
It is the late night in February. I have some music on ('Streets - A Rock Opera' by Savatage. Don't bother. You won't like it.)
It is a very fine album. The songs go through a range of emotions that usually fit my range. Plus, he sings rather course, and my bad singing mixes in well.
Plus, there are some spiritual/soul searching songs mixed in with anger, so for me the pieces fit. I
